Sunday, March 4, 2012

M.I.A. Puppies Post.

First let me say I am sorry I abruptly stopped writing about the puppies. Our family has suffered through many deaths in the last couple of months and I just have not been myself.

The puppies are getting big and are showing a lot of spunk. Although they are now 9 weeks old neither of them are ready to stop nursing. I try to keep them away from their mother as much as possible but there are still those odd occurrences where I let my guard down, and when I turn around, there Asa is nursing the puppies again. It looks ridiculous too. Aizen is half the size as Asa and here he is still nursing. Though I can't say I blame her. I see that familiar look in her eyes as she stands in the middle of the room after having tried with all she has to get their attention and they zoom past her as if she were invisible. So of course from a mother's stand point she's going to want to keep them as long as she possibly can.

In my moment of insanity from all of the stress (my husband going back to work, all the deaths in the family, my son being conically ill.), I put the dogs...all of them up for adoption on craigslist. I had every intentions of re-homing them or at least as many of them as I possibly could. After all, there was no way I could take care of 5 dogs, 4 cats, 5 turtles, a water dragon, snake, tarantula, and two kids and do all of my house hold chores, shopping and errands all by myself. I cried as I hit the "submit" button. And of course I had dozen's of replies from people wanting to take my precious shiba's off my hands.

 But no promise or dollar amount made me feel at ease so much that I could even consider letting any of them go... These are my babies after all. I may not have been the one they were brought into the family for but in the end I have been the one who has raised and loved and cared for each and every one of them.

I even received a nice email from a lady that works with the Shiba Rescue center offering to help me spay/neuter and rehome my shiba's with adoption applications. But once she started asking questions...
Specifics... Like which shiba's did I want to rehome? I looked down into their sparkling eyes and found myself unable to choose. Each one of them had their flaws that made them imperfect. But each one of them also had their hearts leashes firmly clasped to my heart.

Tien'Kou, how I could I even begin to consider to rehome him. He was a token of love shown to me from my husband in times that were so dark I couldn't even see my feet on the ground. He is the only one of my shiba's that never messes my carpet. He never makes a fuss or gets in the way... He's so sweet, gentle, kind, and loving. And he asks for so little.. There is no way I could let my Tien'kou go.

Asa, my little girl... the one that I describe often as being so very much like myself. Asa the one that lays at my side every single time I get sick. She comforts and protects when she knows I am weak.

Aizen, sure he's new to the family... but my husband adores him. After the loss the Buddha I didn't think he would warm up to another dog ever again... but Aizen, something about him... it's like him and Buddha are reincarnates of one another.

Tousen, he's such a sweet boy, he snuggles, and loves, and looked into my eyes as a baby would look into his mothers eyes for guidance.

Sure I could rehome the puppies.. But why? Aizen and Tousen are meant to stay together. And so much grief would come out of their absents. I would miss them, Alex would miss them, Dale would miss them... Asa would miss them... There has to be another way.

That is when it hit me... My problem is not with the dogs. I have wonderful dogs. Even my Great Pyrenees who I had also listed. Is a wonderful dog. He is everything I need him to be. My dogs are not perfect but neither am I, but my dogs are my family. I would never rehome my husband, Alex or the kids, so why am I trying to rehome my dogs?

The problem is there simply is not enough of me to go around. So how do I make more of me go around...?
I stop taking all of the responsibility on my shoulders and put my foot down and do what needs to be done that's how!

No comments:

Post a Comment

Twitter Delicious Facebook Digg Stumbleupon Favorites More